Bah, Humbug

28 Nov

So I had my (somewhat brief) meeting with the liver specialist. Was a little annoyed he had not seen my latest scans – so what were his current decisions based on ? – but was partially to blame as I had been advised to bring the copy I had along with me, and had forgotten to do so.

In any case, he said that as I was responding to the Chemotherapy, I should continue with it for a little longer to ensure the required surgery was as minimal and risk-free as possible, advising me to continue for SIX cycles. I had been hoping it was only to be four, as these last two cycles will fall across the Christmas holidays and my planned snowboarding weekend in January, all the way up to the 1st Feb – which means I’ll get a nice present this year for my birthday anyway, as I would then come of Chemo for February in preparation for surgery in March.

No date was set in stone for the surgery though – More CT / MRI scans after the 6th cycle would determine what happened next. There is a small outside chance that the chemo might “clean up” the liver all on it’s own, but this is quite rare.

In truth, right now, I’m gutted. I was looking forward to a “Chemo free Christmas”, esp. as each cycle gets harder. I had put these dates and plans down as a mental crutch – waypoints to help me get through the long journey ahead, and in 10 mins with very little information provided, I’ve had it all messed around and shifted with what seemed to be a fairly uninformed decision. Probably not the wrong decision, and already I am mapping out what this new news means and finding solace with what it might offer : cheeky snowboard week in February anyone ? Might also be up for a mini-birthday celebartion now as well. And having my folks look after me over xmas week when I am struggling with the nastier part of it is surely not a bad thing.

All of which reminds me it’s injection day on Monday. &^%k. With these extra cycles now planned, am I once again going to persue getting a “long line” or “port” fitted, that will allow the drugs to be adminsitered straight into my central blood stream, not via my poor arms. This should remove the pain in my arms which is one of the very worse side effects, after maybe the vulnerability to cold.

Overall : Bah, humbug.

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